I Iz Hawaiian. Howzit.
This was me this weekend.
Ok, that's not techincally ME, but the theory is the same.
This weekend one of my coworkers offered to take me paddle boarding! I see people doing it all the time, but have never had the chance to go myself. So David and I were exicted about a few hours of time in the water with a friend.
I should have known better.
While giant beach parties are considered by us land-locked people too big of a deal to throw together on a whim, it is like second nature to Hawaiians. Everyday is a beach party to many of them.
So we were having a really hard time trying to finding Grant and his friend - where were they? We finally found them under several shade tents, with tons of food and a portable bbq pit, and a dozen other people. When the Hawaiians go to the beach, they go to PARTY. I should have guessed.
After meeting everyone, it was Time to Laugh at the Haoles. We tried out the boards first. I quickly gathered that it was much harder than it looked, especially for the balance-impaired. Also, the wind was like a freaking gale all week, so it kept blowing my tall ass right into the reef. I spent a lot of time on my knees, paddling away from it, because I was completely ineffectual when standing. I was doing good to remain standing alone, much less while paddling.
I had a good time though. I felt very local, although I'm sure I looked like a freaking idiot. I had no idea what I was doing and was affecting that half-hunched, stiff posture I do when I want to disappear and not be noticed by people. Which just makes me look like a deformed person. I know this, yet I cannot stop myself from doing it.
So, in all my dorky glory, I had a good time. I was trying to be super-considerate with the boards, since the guy who lent them to us had never met me before. So when David tried to come right next to me to talk, I told him to get away from me, and gave him a helpful push.
He may or may not have ended up falling in the water.
Also at one point I ran over an old guy swimming.
We did alright. David was getting it by the end. He was handicapped with a too-short paddle, so we were both doing the hunchback thing. Tandem Losers! We are perfect for each other.
It's another thing to check off the list - paddle boarding! Lots of people actually surf while paddle boarding, but I figured I was enough of a danger to myself and others already.
*By the way, howzit is the one pidgin word that I love and will attempt to bring to the mainland. It's like 'how are you' in one simple word. How are you doing..How's it going..howzit. Nice.*
Ok, that's not techincally ME, but the theory is the same.
This weekend one of my coworkers offered to take me paddle boarding! I see people doing it all the time, but have never had the chance to go myself. So David and I were exicted about a few hours of time in the water with a friend.
I should have known better.
While giant beach parties are considered by us land-locked people too big of a deal to throw together on a whim, it is like second nature to Hawaiians. Everyday is a beach party to many of them.
So we were having a really hard time trying to finding Grant and his friend - where were they? We finally found them under several shade tents, with tons of food and a portable bbq pit, and a dozen other people. When the Hawaiians go to the beach, they go to PARTY. I should have guessed.
After meeting everyone, it was Time to Laugh at the Haoles. We tried out the boards first. I quickly gathered that it was much harder than it looked, especially for the balance-impaired. Also, the wind was like a freaking gale all week, so it kept blowing my tall ass right into the reef. I spent a lot of time on my knees, paddling away from it, because I was completely ineffectual when standing. I was doing good to remain standing alone, much less while paddling.
I had a good time though. I felt very local, although I'm sure I looked like a freaking idiot. I had no idea what I was doing and was affecting that half-hunched, stiff posture I do when I want to disappear and not be noticed by people. Which just makes me look like a deformed person. I know this, yet I cannot stop myself from doing it.
So, in all my dorky glory, I had a good time. I was trying to be super-considerate with the boards, since the guy who lent them to us had never met me before. So when David tried to come right next to me to talk, I told him to get away from me, and gave him a helpful push.
He may or may not have ended up falling in the water.
Also at one point I ran over an old guy swimming.
We did alright. David was getting it by the end. He was handicapped with a too-short paddle, so we were both doing the hunchback thing. Tandem Losers! We are perfect for each other.
It's another thing to check off the list - paddle boarding! Lots of people actually surf while paddle boarding, but I figured I was enough of a danger to myself and others already.
*By the way, howzit is the one pidgin word that I love and will attempt to bring to the mainland. It's like 'how are you' in one simple word. How are you doing..How's it going..howzit. Nice.*
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