Self Control is Overrated

So, I succumbed to my sweet tooth yet again, and this week's food experiment is another sweet thing. I promise, next week will be a non-dessert item. I am just more interested in desserts - they are so much more creative and interesting! Well, to me anyway. And guess who's in charge of this little shindig?!

So. Donut Pies. As soon as I saw this, I knew I had to try it. I mean, really?! Houston, we are at Awesome Level 10.

The day I had slated this cooking extravaganza to take place was also our weekend hiking day. On the way home from the hike I turned to David and said, ''I'm freaking starving. If I have to go home and eat half a chicken breast, there is going to be unpleasantness.'' So we stopped at one of my fav burger joints, Burgers on the Edge, and shared gastronomic nirvana on a bun. Since this was in the same shopping center as the grocery store, I figured, two birds with one stone. I hate leaving the house.

So I know it wasn't my good looks (I was currently makeup-less, bedraggled, and smelling like an ox) that got the checker boy's attention when he asked me if I was making a pie. I replied, 'Um...kinda'. Of course, he wanted to know how you 'kind of' make a pie, so I told him the donut pie idea. He promptly told me when he was getting off, and said to feel free to stop by and let him sample the outcome. Several times. Men. Will Do Anything For Food.

Here you can see my 'ingredients' - basically, I picked up everything pre-made from the store. You could (and probably should) make everything yourself from scratch - the filling, the dough. But I don't have time for this measuring, mixing, and punching down, and whatever else you need to do to make good dough, because I have no idea what that is. Also, lots of dough recipes can really suck and you know what? Pillsbury has already spent thousands of dollars and employed food chemists and bakers to come up with the best possible outcome. In Pillsbury I Trust. And it's pre-rolled! How can you resist the convenience!? Besides, that flaky goodness needs to get to my mouth as fast as possible.

First, cut dough into 3 - 3/12 in wide strips. The recipe says 2 1/2 inches, that that is apparently for the people who like all the inner goo goodness to come leaking out all over the place.

Now the good part: fill with deliciousness of your choice. I went with apple (classic) and a cherry filling in honor of David's dad, who loves cherry pie filling. Apparently his mom sent him to bed every night with a can of cherry pie filling and Dr. Pepper. I told my mom this and she just about had a heart attack.


Yummy, gooey apple pie filling. You know you want some. If you end up using canned pie filing, be sure to taste it! I am constantly doubling spices in recipes, or adding them to things - this needed a lot of cinnamon. What is up, food industry? Bring it on! We can handle it.

Carefully pinch it closed. I was having some serious difficulty getting the seal to actually seal. What do you want from me, dough!? Just work already! Convenience Level: -5 points.

A more artistic shot of the sealing process. Do you know how hard it is to take a picture of yourself in the process of cooking? Very.


First finished DP! Hopefully will not disintegrate upon frying.

Cherry with a stripe of cream cheese. Because David loves cream cheese.

Now we were getting to the part that makes me nervous.

I pretty much never fry anything. It grosses David out, and that's not really what I'm going for when I serve him a meal. Personally, I will eat just about anything if it is fried and covered in cheese. And bacon. With Ranch.

MMMMM

But he prefers to plan on living past 60. Hopefully David will make me a better person, eating-wise. As I'm getting older the good genes are petering out, and I can no longer eat a pound of fried chicken and still go flouncing around in a bathing suit without some embarrassment. Of course, I am making things like these, so apparently enlightenment is still a ways off.

Anyway, the point being I'm pretty ignorant on how to fry things; there has to be more than 'heat up oil - throw in food'. Turns out, there is! *beware - quick learning moment. Skip next paragraph if you don't give a hoot.*

Whenever you fry things, there are always crazy amounts of bubbles. I always wondered what on earth was going on in there. In an extremely paraphrased explanation, as soon as the food hits the oil, it starts to steam, which creates those bubbles. As the steam exits the food, it moistens the outside, and allows the food to keep cooking properly. If the temperature is too high, the outside of the food sears shut, and the steam cannot properly escape, which screws everything up. Also, of you cook too long and no more steam is escaping, the oil starts to rush into the food, making it heavy, soggy and greasy. So, be sure to keep your oil at a constant temperature when frying these, preferably at 325 F. And don't over fry to avoid heavy nastiness.

Class dismissed.

Chopsticks work surprisingly well.

Donuts Pre-Glaze

Ok, after the frying and draining stage there is a big gap because I was Decorating, and I got too excited to actually stop and take a picture of the process. It isn't that interesting anyway. It's the outcome, not the journey. At least in pastry.

In the spirit of being a lazy ass, I used canned frosting. Just plop it into a shallow dish (I used Tupperware) and nuke it in the microwave for 30 seconds to get it to dipping consistency. I did a few normals ones, but then I started playing around by adding in cinnamon for the apples donuts, and cherry goo for that lovely pink color.

So, starting in the left hand corner, we have: apple DP with vanilla frosting a fruit, apple DP with cinnamon frosting, Cherry DP with cherry frosting and sprinkles (!) Cherry and cream cheese with vanilla, and cherry with chocolate and cherry glaze. Be still, my soon-to-be clogged heart.


Donut Pies Dissected

I barely got a picture of the plate, because after that there was this giant snorking noise, and all that was left was a few mangled pieces leftover donut. We declared this Extremely Delicious. The flaky, buttery crust mingled with the warm fruit and sweet icing was a fun handheld treat. Due to the extreme simplicity of these, this could be fun to do with friends, or even kids. If you pureed the filling you could probably make mini ones so your kids don’t go into a diabetic coma. Get creative! Have some fun!

Donut Pies

Ingredients:
· Pie Crusts (1 store-bought box yields around 6 decent donuts)
· Pie Filling
· Canned Icing
· Sprinkles/Decoration

1. First, choose your favorite pie crust recipe, or cheat like me and use a pre-made one.
2. Next, decide what your filling would be. For a good filling, you can mix one ripe banana, a small amount (1/4 cup, adding more to desired thickness) of heavy whipping cream, and 1 tablespoon of brown sugar, and two pinches of cinnamon. Mash it until it is incorporated, but still a little bit lumpy. You can fill them with just about anything you'd use in a pie though. Let your filling sit to the side.
3. Roll out your pie crust, and then score into strips. The strips should be about 2.5 (I say at least 3) inches wide, but as long or as short as you'd like. The length will determine how large the donut's circumference will be, so if you like mini donuts, keep them shorter.
4. Lengthwise, spoon a small amount of filling in each strip. Be sure to leave a small gap of space at the top and bottom of the strip.
5. Fold the crust over the filling lengthwise, so that you have a long, narrow, filled "log" of pie crust with filling inside.
6. Form into a circle.
7. Since we don't have a deep fryer, we filled a saucepan with about 3 cups of canola oil, or until it covers the donuts, set to med high heat. Once hot, gently place the donuts one at a time into the pan, frying about 3-4 minutes or until golden.
8. Gently remove from frying pan and place on paper towels to blot excess oil.
9. Garnish as desired: with additional fruit topping, whipped cream, ice cream, or for a more donutty look, chocolate icing and sprinkles or swirls. Yum.